To: Brad Blackstone
From: Jie Lin Low
Subject: Self introduction
Dear Brad,
My name is Low Jie Lin from Telematics(Intelligent Transportation System) Engineering. I am writing this email to introduce myself.
I graduated from Nanyang Polytechnic, with a diploma of Electronics, Computer and Communication Engineering(ECC) specialize in Wireless Communication. ECC is a course focusing on electronics, programming and also communication skills which is similar to the course i am studying now. I choose wireless communication as my specialization as i am interested in creating mobile application and automotive engineer like self-driving car and gps.
I joined Telematics Engineering hoping to further broadening my knowledge in this area. Also, intelligent transport system market is now expanding rapidly so i believe it will definitely benefits me in the future.
I enjoyed playing badminton, swimming and watching dramas during my leisure time. I start learning swimming when i was 10 years old. I also like watching movies in theater to relieve stress.
Thanks for reading and lets have a enjoyable time for the next 18 hours of lesson !
Your Sincerely,
Jie Lin
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I have commented on Xin En and Derrick post
Dear Jie Lin,
ReplyDeleteThrough your introduction, I have learned more about your interest.
One small thing I would add is to maybe include more details on what you would like to achieve in SIT apart from broadening your knowledge in the area of Telematics.
All in all, I look forward to reading more of your posts!
Regards,
Xin En
Dear Xin En,
DeleteThanks for reading and replying !
Regards,
Jie Lin
Dear Jie Lin,
ReplyDeleteAfter reading your post, I got to know you better. Wow, it is so rare to find females interested in creating mobile applications and self driving cars. I hope that those interest will give you the drive for Telematics in school! Study hard and enjoy your time in school!
Best Regards,
Derrick Hiu
Dear Derrick,
DeleteThank for your reply !
Regards,
Jie Lin
Dear Jie Lin,
ReplyDeleteI am glad that you have came into Telematics to continue to pursue your passion. I hope that your interest will drive you nearer to your goal.
Regards,
Sze Dee
Dear Sze Dee,
DeleteThanks for reading and replying :)
Regards,
Jie Lin
Dear Jie Lin,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this fairly clear, concise and yet comprehensive introduction. You do well presenting us with some details from your academic background and in listing your hobbies. It's understandable from this letter why studying telematics appeals to you.
Your language use is good, but there is a need for revision in these areas:
1) Wrong word form
--- specialize in Wireless Communication.
--- hoping to further broadening
2) I choose wireless communication as my specialization as i am interested in creating mobile application and automotive engineer like self-driving car and gps. >>> (verb tense / capitalization)
3) ...it will definitely benefits.... >>> (verb form)
4) verb tense
--- I enjoyed playing...
--- I start learning swimming when i was 10 years old.
5) Thanks for reading and lets have a enjoyable time for the next 18 hours of lesson ! >>> (run on sentence)
Let's work on these. I'm happy to be helping you this term.
Dear Bratt,
DeleteThanks for the reply and i will try to improve on my mistake.